News on the Home Front - October 1917

FROM THE WESTERN STAR AND WALLACE COUNTY GAZETTE – RIVERTON OCTOBER 25, 1917

·        The Happiest Part of the Day for a Woman is when she can sit down in peace and comfort and enjoy a cup of Tiger Tea

·        As soon as you feel that there is anything wrong with the stomach, the best course of action is to take a dose of Beecham’s Pills

·        Is dishwashing hateful, washday a dreaded undertaking, sweeping a mammoth task, and does the week’s ironing seem a pile miles high? The very best thing for you is a few weeks or months outdoors, among the song birds and roses. The next best thing to do is to get a bottle of Nyal Tonic.

·        On the western front the British are still hammering away, and the fifth battle on the slopes of Passchendaele Ridge resulted in fighting as determined as any in the war. Unfortunately, heavy rain fell throughout the progress of the advance, and very soon the whole area was a sea of mud... The opinion is held by some that General Haig could drive the Germans further back if he desired to do so, but as the object is to weaken the German forces, the killing process is the essential thing at present and not the winning of territory.

·        The greatest service America could render at this juncture would be to provide an air service of 5,000 units and carry out a great raid. Each machine would require to carry in its planes two torpedoes of one ton each, and have a speed of 120 miles an hour, a radius of 500 miles, and be fitted with a special recording apparatus. Raids by aeroplanes not in pairs but in thousands, would soon accomplish something and hasten the time of the end.

·        Tuesday afternoon was beautifully fine for the ladies to open the croquet season. The lawn has been greatly improved, and in addition there is now a comfortable little tea room and shelter on the grounds. Afternoon tea was served and the games went on merrily.

·        A striking instance of official cheese-paring was mentioned by a delegate to Friday’s meeting of the War Funds Council at Invercargill. A young Southlander enlisted. His teeth were not in very good order, and he was directed to have three or four of them out, the military authorities supplying him with an equal number of artificial molars. In camp the soldier contracted sciatica was eventually discharged and sent home. But he was not allowed to keep the false teeth, as the military demanded them. Now, although the young man can boast of no bullet marks or bayonet scars, he displays evidence of his services with the colours, sundry gaps in the otherwise unbroken ranks of his masticating agents.

·        The YMCA is a wonderful organization, and their good work baffles description; they are everywhere when needed. You cannot imagine the good work they are doing in the City of London where hidden dangers abound for the men, who, accustomed as they are to conditions in our precious homeland, are all too unprepared for the many pitfalls.

·        There is a high percentage of young lambs to be seen and the fine weather, together with an abundance of feed is greatly in their favour. Cheese factories are losing favour each year, the support going to butter factories, there being a great deal less labour and much more profit.

·        Thomas and Beattie, the Mail Order House offer Navy Serge Costumes 75/- to 147/-; White Pique Costumes 39/6 to 47/6; Poplin Costumes 47/6 to 57/6; Tussore Costumes 47/6 to 90/-; New Voile Blouses, hand-embroidered 9s 11d to 27s 6d.

·        “Colonel, can you loan me?” “No Sir, I can’t. And if I could, I wouldn’t. I have been loaning you money for a year and you make no effort to return it.” “But I wanted to know if you would loan me ...” “And I tell you beforehand, I won’t.”  “Well then do not. I wanted to borrow your fountain pen to make out a cheque for what I owe you, but if you’re in no hurry, I’m not.”