Gordon Brown & Gillian Duffy - Lo! The Bird is Fallen

THE SCOTS IN LANCASHIRE

Gordon Brown's demise at hands of a lovable Lancashire Lass pensioner stirs memories of similarly unfortunate clashes with the Scots.

In the 1715 and 1745 Jacobite Rebellions, Lancashire was split between the 'Blacks' (the Liberal Whigs) and the 'Jacks' (the white emblem Tories - who were allied with the Scots).

As late as 1747, there was still a bit of bother going on now and again in Rochdale between rival gangs of lads under the Blacks and Jacks banners.

It all tended to end badly.

Following the Battle of Preston in 1715, the Lancashire Lads who had sided with the Jacobites were given an especially hard time in terms of executions and transportation to the West Indies - reflecting the probability that a special deal had been cut with the Scots to persuade the Highlanders to surrender.

In the main though, Lancashire stood firm with the rest of England. And the exploits of local sharp-shooter Edward Jolly in the Battle of Preston were commemorated in a local doggerel ballad that I have refashioned for the current occasion.

LO! THE BIRD IS FALLEN

Three cheers for Gillian Duffy
Who fought a doughty fight
When the rabble from Whitehall
She drove in headlong flight.

Going for bread and milk
She stumbled on a Scot
Who jacked her up
With smarming on the spot

He’d come with party brigands
To loot with dirk and kilt
Fattening his expenses
With England’s largesse spilt

She asked about the debt
And schools, and immigration’s ills
From east, and north the Border -
With Scottish votes on English bills

Spying on this one-eyed Jack
Haughty, angry, distant
The media eavesdropped
On him and his assistant.

He turned and told his henchman
‘She thinks! - She isn’t one of mine
This grandma is a bigot
Find me Jacks who toe the line’.

He said it was heat of moment
He was sort of caught off guard
Pressure of the campaign
And being humble is so hard

With pride she kept peace
Against whose cannonade
No microphone, no rebel
Might raise a barricade.

In honour of this noble deed
Her name through all the county
Was seen a heroine’s name
Deserving Rochdale’s bounty.

Three cheers for Gillian Duffy
Who fought a doughty fight
When the rabble from Whitehall
She drove in headlong flight.

Two salvoes true and mighty
Rang with this grandma’s fun
And lo! “The bird is fallen”
Raised cheers from everyone.

And so it was that famous day
That Gillian was called brave
For many a English voter’s life
Her gallantry did save.